So what now in my merry world?
Well Sunday was the meeting of my drinking club, or as someone nicknamed it Alcoholics Proud, and the theme was Japan.
We drank sake and plum brandy and ate sushi, we drank Shochu and Japanese whiskey and cocktails with a Japanese twist. It was a pleasant night of alcohol and gentle chatter. Say what you like about us drunks but we do like chatting about alcohol, the methods of making it, the ways of serving it and the ways of incorporating it into our lives. Incidentally Japan is definitely on my list of places to visit, though I wish I could go back 200 years or so (and as a man).
Also this week Sleepy left the hospital (on which more later – probably after I have actually had a chance to see him) and I went down to my campus. I needed to sign off my mentoring sessions as per DSA funding regs – incidentally I did get them to pay for paper and internet cost for the last year (woo money c. £200), if only I could get a chair to support my shoulder too. Also I went to the library – which would have been successful except for arguments with the copy machines, suffice to say there was no photocopying or scanning for byghan today but books returned and books checked out. (I’d tell you what but you probably don’t give a damn).
Incidentally I might consider taking more train journeys as incentives to sit and write on my thesis. Would you believe that because of editing despite all the improvements I have made to No.4 I still only have 10,000 words? Godsdammit! I think the editing is worth it, but I really need to put pen to paper so to speak and get more of my opinions down. I will beat the procrastination monster.l
In other news, I am 5 days clear of Prozac (and a few days short of upping my mirtazapine) and feeling … well great/shit tbh. Sex drive currently nil (body image is totally screwed), sleep pattern still elusive, body hurting like crazy, and totally obsessing about self harm (though physically I have it under control, thanks to fresh scars still hurting) but on the up-side … on the upside I have feelings and they aren’t all misanthropic..
In some ways I haven’t so much noticed that I have stopped fluoxetine as feel grumpy that mirtazapine seems to have stopped working. I’d like to say I’m sure that prozac made some difference but I can’t say it with conviction.. it has always felt like an ineffectual holder. I noticed citalopram, I noticed mirtazapine but fluoxetine I just took.
So here’s to another day gone and sleep beckoning.